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Day 1

well,it's day 1 for me in rehab,im here for about 2 weeks.and i've a
ready learned im pregnant and have to eat stuff here. i made some friends,i get no sleep here.litterally,i try to sleep,but am always monitered. i wanna cut too,but,im being watched,im starting to think people here arent crazy when they say we're being watched.They have movies for the teens here.but,it's PG stuff.i've only seen one disney movie here,camp rock,and i already disney :/ now they got me in therapy,like that'll help,and i got locked in my room for fighting with some chick earlier. well,this is going to be a terrible 14 days :/ ill try to keep ya posted if anyone cares

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Blog entry published by 1 year ago ()

Day 2

Well,another day at rehab..they only positive thing was i got to see my baby brother,i missed him SOO much!! even if it's only been a few days..im not used to being without him. I'm getting REAL sick of finding nemo!! dory's song is stuck in my head,and no,its not as fun as youd think.i wish someone would destroy this movie for good. i saw a cooking channel today,and felt SO dirty! they were making stuffed chicken,and the chef looked like he was enjoying putting his hand in that ckicken a bit too much! haha,the fun part of rehab. And,i managed to cut when the staff wasnt looking.just a quick scratch,but,anything was better than nothing.and,i managed not to fight anyone,even though i REALLY wanted too. i didnt want to be locked in my room again. well,thats about all i did today..so,see ya! keep ya posted if i can.bye

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Blog entry published by 1 year ago ()

Really????

Well,it's day 3..or..4,i'm not really sure anymore. but i am positive,that,i'm in rehab,and,im positive,that it sucks. Anyway,i'm in this group therapy (G.T) thing,and the first thing the therapist says when we all get in "Ok,now,i just want you to know before we get started,that drugs are very bad and can kill you,and i want you all to get clean,and i hope you want the same thing" REALLY????? i mean,come on! why would we be here if we didnt want to get clean? this is why i don't bother with STUPID PEOPLE!! i mean,half the people are ok,but the therapist are just aweful.except one,and i only like him becuase i punched him in the face and he let me get away with it :D oh,and on top of that,they are positive i have an eating disorder,and WATCHED me eat,to make sure i did.i threw it up later,but,still,they should lay off. and i'm about this freaking finding nemo DVD,right now,i'm hoping he gets eaten by a shark,or something. i have seen this 25 times since i got here,i have no option..they REALLY need some more movies,or cable,or SOMETHING,hell,bubble wrap is better than finding nemo!! Read more »

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Blog entry published by 1 year ago ()

Whats so great about it anyway?

I'm sorry im not perfect,i'm sorry i dont have a spray on tan,or fake boobs.Im sorry i do drugs,im sorry im a fighter. Hell,im sorry i came into the world sometimes,but you know what? I'm here to stay,im not perfect,i dont care,who is perfect? Im not gonna spend my life waiting on prince charming or a genie to make life better,you know why? becuase its not gonna happen. So,i'm gonna stop wishing and waiting,and move on with my life. Becuase even if i've screwed up,im staying. So,im gonna fight,and say whats on my mind. i'm gonna be who i want to be,and nobodys gonna stop me, besides,what's so great about perfect anyway?

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Blog entry published by 1 year ago ()

back to hell.

well,i cant pay for the trailor anymore,my boss fired me,i've failed all my classes,and to top it all off,we have to move back with dad.He's back to touching.and hitting.i have to watch out and make sure he doesnt get my sisters.they dont know what he's up too,but i do,and,im gonna keep them from it.I have to loose even more sleep,gain more bruises,but,i dont care.He's done it twice since i got back,and,i want help,but,i cant go to the cops,i dont trust them,amd nobody will believe me becuase im a guy.im just stuck in this hell hole :/

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xxwarriorxx Blog entry published by 1 year ago ()

journal

My body is my journal.Every cut is a word,every scar a story. I didnt put it in paper,becuase paper doesnt work. I have scars on my face,neck,arms,legs,stomach,feet.And its all a different story.No,i'm not "emo" i'm me. I dont wear black,i cut and listen to music,becuase its how i relate.The outside pain,is no fucking match for the pain on the inside of me all the time. Every cut tells a time i was sad,or angry,or hurt. And the newest one,worthless,its to remind me that i am,that i dont deserve better than what i get already,it's gonna be on me forever,my body is a journal,that doesnt need a pencil to write,it just needs a strong enough emotion

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Blog entry published by 1 year ago ()