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11 weeks SI-free.
Printer-friendly versionI can't really believe it. The first few weeks were the worst; then I went another month in a numb period; I broke down about five days ago and nearly lost control, but I somehow, somehow, managed to fight it. I think I just kept telling myself what a waste it would be after all these weeks in control. I don't know.
I haven't blogged in a while. The problem is, the more I think about it, the more I try to confront my deep-seated need for it and try to cleanse myself - I get too involved, and the need comes back, heavier than before. I just have this horrible feeling I won't be able to correct myself without cutting again in the future. And I know stopping is not the only answer, because part of me still greatly looks forward to starting again. Because honestly, I feel like I'm just putting off the need, and it will come back to take me over.
It's just a matter of time.
Blog entry published by 1 year ago ()
Comments
Good job! I applaud you
1 year () (Permalink)Good job! I applaud you :)
Keep it up, because you CAN beat this.
No one cares if your back is bleeding, they're concerned with their hair receding. -
AFP
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Kool Aid!!!!!
1 year () (Permalink)That great !! Stay strong !!! 11 weeks that's something to be proud of!!
I say Kool Aid to you !!!! That means it's a good thing. : )
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11 weeks! Congratulations!
1 year () (Permalink)11 weeks! Congratulations! Whatever your reason for putting off cutting, I admire your courage to take on this challenge. Maybe after a while it will no longer have to be a "need." Stay strong :)
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much thanks, harbor. you
1 year () (Permalink)much thanks, harbor. you always seem to comment on my blogs and make things a little bit easier.
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I'm here if you'd like to
1 year () (Permalink)I'm here if you'd like to talk :) Good luck
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email me anytime.
1 year () (Permalink)are_you_mychemicalromance_
hotmail [dot] com :)
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