Today on the bus ride home from the basketball game we just played horribly in you told us to stop crying, you told us to toughen up and fight back then you asked us why we were on this bus and on this team. I almost broke down into tears. I wanted to say that this team is keeping me alive. Keeping me safe from myself. I wanted to tell you that over the summer and in the fall all I wanted to do was die. How I wanted to kill myself and how my legs and wrists were covered inscars where I slid a blade across my skin and how this team is keeping me from throwing up after I eat each day but I didn't do any of those things because of this team how much I love to play the game I love with the team I love. I wanted to tell you how this team is keeping me alive. But instead when it was my turn to talk I just told you that I love basketball and I want to be a better basketball player.