My first cutting episode was when I was 16. This guy (I will call Jay for privacy reasons) who had dated girls at my school started talking to me, mainly through facebook messaging because he was in college & I was still in high school. He made really good friends with me & was super sweet to me and I felt like I could really talk to him. Everything was fine. Then I started feeling real stressed about things and people kept adding more & more stress to my pile, so I started scratching myself really hard. The next day I found I loved seeing the scratches, I felt a sense of relief and control. But then I realized they were on my arms where people could see. So I started cutting my upper legs with an earring.

I tried to tell Jay & he was really upset & said we needed to talk about it so I became terrified he'd tell someone and told him my friend hacked my account & made that up & I told him Id never do it. He believed me.

I started to only cut when life was just too much to handle, I only cut if I was too stressed. Read more »