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Whos cuts were deeper and whos shed more blood then I ever could...

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For the first time in my life I met someone who's cuts were far deeper then mine and who's shed more blood then I ever could.

 She pretty and had many friends, but for some reason I start noticing that she was soon sitting by herself. So one day I walked home with her to find that on her arm  were scars bigger then I have ever seen. She noticed I was staring and said "It didn't hurt." She told me that they are for show. I knew right then and there that she doesn't cut for feelings or to feel something, she cut for attention.

My first thought was to slap her. Cause I myself is a cutter and hate people who cut for attention, but she starting laughing and said "Your the first not to scream or have a scared look on your face."

It was wried cause even tho she was laughing I could see the pain in her face. After that day I started hanging out with her more often. I don't think she knows i'm a cutter. Cause of course I hide my cuts and scars from people views. A little over a week of hanging with her she asks for a sleepover at her place. Thinking if it was all for show then, she must have a perfect life. Boy was I wrong...

Her house was huge and when we stepped inside I saw a strange looking kid and her mother. From what I heard her father died and the mother started going out with a guy who had a kid himself. She said that her mother thinks if the kid doesn't love her, then he'll never marry her, and that she abandoned her for his child.

On our way up to her room I notice the boyfriend sitting in a chair looking straight at us. He had the face of a rapist. I could feel his eyes on me looking at me as if I was naked. To be honest I was scared to spend the night.

Her room had everything I wanted, phones, games, laptop, and a room as big as a basement. But it didn't matter cause after a little while she got creepy and weird when she was showing me her razor. She said " It feels like a paper cut only deeper."

Which i never heard anyone say.

Then she started cutting in front of me saying "I have to put on a big show tomorrow!" I  did try stopping her. She cutting with something that looked like she found outside all rusted up.

She didn't care where she was cutting at. She was just swinging that thing around till her arm was red with blood. I got cut while trying to stop her. In the end I kicked her in the face and called 911.

Weeks later our homeroom teacher says that she's getting/got the help she needed, and is living with her aunt in Utah. From the stories I heard the boyfriend left and her mom went to rehab for drinking.

It just made me realize that even if they're doing it for show, they still have problems that we can relate to as a cutter.

The Author

Creativity - Personal Story/Recovery Story published by 2 years ago ()

Comments

It's a good thing you were

It's a good thing you were there to stop her. Something worse could have happened.

Why was she doing it for show? Well, maybe she was waiting for someone like you to notice the pain she was in. Beneath the surface, I guess we all have our problems. Thanks for sharing.

I start again
And whatever pain may come
Today this ends
I’m Forgiving What I’ve Done

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