Self-Injury: A Struggle

By Category: Emotional Pain & Mental Illness

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And the fog rolls heavy on her
and she feels the weight of life
though it's red blood flowing from her heart
it feels like cold blue ice
and the colours mix together
to grey.

-Grey Street, Dave Matthews Band

~

She feels like kicking out all the windows
And setting fire to this life
She could change everything about her
Using colors bold and bright
But all the colors mix together to grey
And it breaks her heart.

-Grey Street, Dave Matthews Band

~

One sees that dead, vacant look steal sometimes over the rarest, finest of women's faces, - in the very midst, it may be, of their warmest summer's day; and then one can guess at the secret of intolerable solitude that lies hid beneath the delicate laces and brilliant smile.

-Life in the Iron Mills, Rebecca Harding Davis

~

i think your bruise was understated
'cause you can't feel this anymore
it's getting bluer and you can't keep faking
that you can't feel this anymore.

-Your Bruise, Death Cab For Cutie

Recommended by Lauren.

~

Mom, there are hurdles here
That I cannot seem to clear
Dad, there are demons 'round
And though I said that I
Said I'd be alright, I lied
I lied
I lied
I lied.

-Hurdles Even Here, The Decemberists

~

How do you live with your self?
How could you possibly hurt someone like myself?
The saddest part, though, is I would take you back.
You've turned me into some spineless hypochondriac.

-Bruises, Majanda Delfino

~

I can't stop thinking about
Cutting myself up.
Visual bruises can be covered with make-up.
But down to the core,
I'm all bruises.

-Bruises, Majanda Delfino

~

Why do you decide to run these circles
bruised around my thighs?
Sleepless nights the bleeding clots
Why your eyes encapture my thoughts?

-Siren, Majanda Delfino

~

All that stuff you try to do and nothing ever works. Makes me think of the story of the little mermaid. It's like you said yes to an enormous sacrifice so you could have legs and mix with others. And every step is excruciatingly painful. What everybody else does with mind-blowing ease demands unbelievable effort from you.

-Baise-Moi, Virginie Despentes

Recommended by Shay.

~

Those who have suffered will understand that pain is welcome when it's all you have left,
come and die with me.

-Come With Me, Deviates

Recommended by caitlin.

~

Suffering has been stronger than all other teaching, and has taught me to understand what your heart used to be. I have been bent and broken, but - I hope - into a better shape.

-Great Expectations, Charles Dickens

~

For each ecstatic instant
We must an anguish pay
In keen and quivering ration
To the ecstasy.

-For each ecstatic instant, Emily Dickinson

~

Pain -- has an Element of Blank --
It cannot recollect
When it begun -- or if there were
A time when it was not --

It has no Future -- but itself --
Its Infinite contain
Its Past -- enlightened to perceive
New Periods -- of Pain.

-Pain -- has an Element of Blank --, Emily Dickinson

Recommended by Shay.

~

The first Day's Night had come --
And grateful that a thing
So terrible -- had been endured --
I told my Soul to sing --

She said her Strings were snapt --
Her Bow -- to Atoms blown --
And so to mend her -- gave me work
Until another Morn --

And then -- a Day as huge
As Yesterdays in pairs,
Unrolled its horror in my face --
Until it blocked my eyes --

My Brain -- begun to laugh --
I mumbled -- like a fool --
And tho' 'tis Years ago -- that Day --
My Brain keeps giggling -- still.

And Something's odd -- within --
That person that I was --
And this One -- do not feel the same --
Could it be Madness -- this?

-The first Day's Night had come, Emily Dickinson

~

some people wear their smile
like a disguise
those people who smile a lot
watch the eyes
i know it 'cause i'm like that a lot
you think everything's okay
and it is
'til it's not.

-outta me, onto you, Ani DiFranco

~

And you're trying hard to figure out
Just exactly how you feel
Before you end up parked and sobbing
Forehead on the steering wheel.

-So What, Ani DiFranco

Recommended by Shay.

~

I am out here studying stones, trying to learn to be less alive
Using all of my will to keep very still, still even on the inside.

-Studying Stones, Ani DiFranco

Recommended by Shay.

~

'Cause I dont care if they eat me alive
I've got better things to do than survive.

-Swan Dive, Ani DiFranco

~

'Cos a little bird told me
that jumping is easy
that falling is fun
right up till you hit the sidewalk
shivering and stunned.

-Swan Dive, Ani DiFranco

Recommended by Alicia.

~

Do you ever have that dream when you open your mouth and you try to scream
but you cant make a sound?
Thats everyday starting now - don't tell me it's gonna be alright, you cant
sell me on your optimism tonight.

-Wish I May, Ani DiFranco

Recommended by Shay.

~

I don't think I am strong enough to do this much longer - God I wish I was
stronger
This song can never be long enough to express every longing - God I wish it
was longer.

-Wish I May, Ani DiFranco

Recommended by Shay.

~

I gotta suck it up and savour the taste of my own behaviour
I am spinning with longing faster then a roulette wheel
This is not who I meant to be, this is not how I meant to feel.

-Wish I May, Ani DiFranco

Recommended by Shay.

~

I'm losing my love of adventure, I'm losing all respect for me and myself
tonight
I wonder what happens if I get to the end of this tunnel and there isn't a
light
I've worn down the treads on all of my tires, i've worn through the elbows
and the knees of my clothing
And I'm staring down the gravel driveway of desire trying not to wake up my
sleeping self loathing.

-Wish I May, Ani DiFranco

Recommended by Shay.

~

All the world's light won't ease my pain
It won't cease, I'm diseased
Will you hang me please?

-Sick Of It All, The Distillers

Recommended by Gwen.

~

I'm a girl
I'm only thirteen
My body rots
Cause I won't fucking eat
I'm a silent star on the b-roll
I'm a mirror fucking image of no control
Give me an award
I conquered food again
What else is better in life than to purge my pain?
If I cut, I won't look like that
If I cut, If I cut,
I won't feel like this shit.

-Sick Of It All, The Distillers

Recommended by Gwen.

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