Breadcrumbs:
[female, age 18, began to SI at age 16, Art Student]
I feel like I should stop SI-ing, I know it's not the right thing to do. But SI keeps me calm and collected and I don't want to lose that, I like having the control over my pain. The problem is that the more dependant I get on the SI the harder it will be to control. For me, losing control of SI means injury on impulse, a disociative idnetity or voice in my head, and attemted suicide. Either way I lose control, which is why SI is such a struggle.

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