Favorite Ritual

I most always cut in the shower. I turn on the shower and put my razors in the soap holder. After I condition my hair, I plug the drain and take a bath. I lie in the tub and but my left wrist, first cutting a narrow, deep cut, then angling my razor up and taking off as much skin as possible. After about 3 or 4 good cuts like this, I hold my wrist up and watch the water and blood run down the inside of my forearm until the bleeding slows. Then, I finish my shower and continue like normal.

In Their Own Words Information

Person: 

[female, age 17, began SI at age 11, High School Student]

Thu, 2010-07-29 19:39 — Anonymous

[Female, 17, Began to SI at the age of 15, High school drama student]

My trigger time is usually at night right before I go to sleep. I make three cuts (always three) at various locations (mainly upper thighs). The depth of the cuts will depend on how I feel that day. I then grab one piece of tissue paper to soak up the blood and dab until no more blood is flowing out. Occasionally this is the part where all my emotions start to flow and I will cry and have a breakdown, and then when I've finally cried enough I'll go to sleep and wake up the next day as if everything is normal, apart from a few more fresh red marks on the skin.

In Their Own Words Information

Person: 

[female, age 17, began to SI at age o15, high school drama student]

Thu, 2010-07-01 00:02 — Anonymous

my last ritual

The last 'ritual' I went throught with cutting was I would cut up my inner thighs [I still do that, it's way easier to hide] and I would cut really deep, then when it started bleeding, I'd smere my blood all over things. I remember I used to clothes to mop up my blood and I'd rub blood all over them as well, I'd wipe my blood on my bedroom walls, I'd rub it everywhere. I even got to the point where I was convinced that I'd lost my creativity for poems because instead of writing and cutting when I got upset, I'd just cut. I felt like I lost all ability to express myself through words, so my notebook I had with all my stories and poems in it, I'd replace what I had to say with my blood. I'd smere my blood all over my notebook pages beecause I felt like that was all I could ever say. I've picked up writing a little bit again, but at the same time I still feel like I've lost it.

In Their Own Words Information

Person: 

[female, age 18, began to SI at age 13]

Thu, 2010-05-06 12:03 — autopsy_girl

do you have any rituals?

my ritual is to keep my kit in my nightstand in a little makeup bag, I pour myself a drink then lie on my bed (no tv, no lights, no music, nothing) and begin to cut, once I feel relieved (usually when blood has begun to dry). I clean up and go back to normal.

In Their Own Words Information

Person: 

[female, age 20, began to SI at 13, art student]

Fri, 2010-04-30 08:02 — Anonymous

Do You Have Any Rituals?

Rituals here have a meaning but I don't treat this like rituals but...

I like burning more than cutting, or punching.

I do it in my room like 90% of the times. I do it with scalpels the most, or maybe razors, or something with sharpness. But I love with matches, or cigarette lighter, or any lighter I can find.

When I do it, I like hearing music, maybe something like BlutEngel with Angels Of The Dark, Born Again, or that type of lyrics. Or Emilie Autumn with lyrics like The Art Of Suicide, Liar, I Want My Inocence Back, etc.

Then I just go out like nothing happened, even if I do it in public places.

In Their Own Words Information

Person: 

[female, age 18, has self-injured all her life but remembers at age 12]

Mon, 2010-04-26 11:20 — Nagizuma

[female, age 16, began to SI at age 12, high school student]

for the past year i've been keeping my "tools" in a jewelry box. bandaids, cotton, safety pin, razor, gauze, tape. before then i was still trying out new spots to hide my stuff so i didnt have this somewhat perminant spot. now that i've been sleeping more downstairs i keep my stuff in my make up bag because my mom doesn't have a reason to go in there. I almost always cut while i'm getting ready for a shower. i turn on the water so she thinks i'm in the shower but i cut before getting in. i cut before a shower because my mom won't be suspecting anything at that time, it's calming knowing that no one will interrupt me, and i like the sting from the water. whether i cut in my room where there's privacy or before a shower i usually am infront of a mirror to watch myself and look at the cuts from another veiw through the mirror. i always do these things.

In Their Own Words Information

Person: 

[female, age 16, began to SI at age 12, high school student]

Tue, 2010-03-30 11:05 — Anonymous

[female, age 17, began to SI at age 13]

I used to cut myself outside, in a secluded area, or in a room lit by candles. My favorite thing now is to be cut by someone else, but that doesn't always work out. I usually do it wherever's convenient and where I wont be interrupted.

In Their Own Words Information

Person: 

[female, age 17, began to SI at age 13]

Fri, 2009-04-03 23:33 — Gabrielle

[female, age 26, began to SI at age 14]

Yes. I always use matches. I have not self-injured before because i couldn't find any. I always burn the match and then blow it out and try to time when it will be the perfect "heat". I always burn myself on the same wrist and I have an ongoing pattern. I have made new patterns, burning in between old scars. I recently did it and burned on top of an old scar because I felt the untouched skin surrounding what I have was... out of the right area.

In Their Own Words Information

Person: 

[female, age 26, began to SI at age 14]

Fri, 2009-04-03 23:33 — Gabrielle

[female, age 24, began to SI at age 16 1/2]

Sometimes. I lay out all my "tools" -- the blade, the stuff I need to clean and bandage, etc. But I don't really consider that a ritual, it just makes sense to me-- otherwise I make a mess when I'm looking for things and bleeding all over the place. I don't live alone, so I can't afford that.

In Their Own Words Information

Person: 

[female, age 24, began to SI at age 16 1/2]

Fri, 2009-04-03 23:33 — Gabrielle

[female, age 19, began to SI at age 15]

Not really. I listen to music sometimes. I usually go to bed after I've finished cutting because I almost always do it late at night.

In Their Own Words Information

Person: 

[female, age 19, began to SI at age 15]

Fri, 2009-04-03 23:33 — Gabrielle