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  1. doghitscar's Blog

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    http://doghitscar.bandcamp.com/track/ammonia-and-orchids[/embed]

    it may not necessarily relate to self injury in particular but i want to share this recording of a demo i composed on a bad day.

    lyrics:

    oh the irony to be sick off of the medicine 
    im playing ding dong ditch with the gates of heaven 
    i never ever believed that angels existed 
    or at least i never ever expected them to carry bags under their eyes 
    or dirt under their finger nails 
    im playing bloody knuckles with with the walls you built around you 
    i will swing right to the bones to get to you

  2. shoutdee_'s Blog

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    shoutdee_
    Latest Entry

    Last night was one of the worst nights. I relapsed.. I thought my summer was gonna be great, but I guess not.

     

    That’s life, right?

  3. The Darkness in Light
    Latest Entry

    It’s been a while since I’ve been on here. I’ve gone through every one of my blog entries, they all sound so hateful. So spiteful. Did I really feel like that? Did I really think like that? I cannot remember most of…well, anything. But I just sounded so distraught and full of hate, like it was me against the world.

    Now, I am no less distraught, possibly more so than now…but I am calmer. I say that comes from my resignation to this monotonous inescapable life style. I’ve given up, I’ll be a pharmacist like my parents want me to be. I’ll keep smiling. I’ll work out like my life depends on it…I’ll change to better suit the path that has been set infront of me, and I won’t complain. I’ve nothing to complain about. Not a single thing. Loving family, middle-class, pets, decent grades, technology. I do not deserve to complain. So I’ll shut up. I have to. 

  4. AiméeRousseau's Blog

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    AiméeRousseau
    Latest Entry

    Take your hands over your bumpy love body naked
    and remember the first time you touched someone
    with the sole purpose of learning all of them.
    Touch them because the light is pretty on them
    and the dust and the sunlight dance the way your heart did.
    Touch yourself with a purpose.

    Your body is the most beautiful void.
    Fathers and uncles are not claiming you knife anymore,
    are not your razor, now put the sharpness back.
    Lay your hands flat and feel the surface of scarred skin;
    I once touched a tree with charred limbs.
    The stumps were still breathing,
    but the tops were just ashy remains;
    I wonder what it’s like to come back from that,
    because sometimes I feel forest fires
    erupting from my wrists,
    and smoke signals sent out of the most beautiful things
    I’ve ever seen.

    Love your body the way your mother loved your baby feet,
    and brother arm-wrapping shoulders,
    and remember this is important.
    You are worth more than who you fuck.
    You are worth more that a waistline.
    You are worth more than beer bottles displayed like artifacts You are worth more than any naked body could proclaim
    in the shadows;
    more than a man’s wim or your father’s mistake.
    You are no less valuable as a size 16 than a size 4,
    you are no less valuable as a 32A than a 36C.
    Your sexiness is defined by concentric circles within your wood.
    You are a goddamned tree stump with leaves sprouting out.
     Reborn.

     

  5. fighting myself
    Latest Entry

    *************Warning triggering**************
    My x the one that had rapped me had called me three times today. Using I guess a disposable phone or something to make his number appear different. I didn’t stay on long but every time he called except the last call he was just breathing into the phone which is creepy to wake up to. The last one he said he misses me and wants me back that he won’t do it again. Then I asked who it was when he said his name I hung up. But every time it was just breathing I hung up and called the number back and always got some collection agency.
    All of that was triggering it recreated the memories of that weekend. Starting out fine but ending up a nightmare.
    Its like I can still feel the teeth marks he left on the inside of my lip when he bit it until my mouth started flooding with blood. With the metallic taste on my tongue as I started choking on the blood turning my head to the side. To try to spit out the blood but as I turned my head slightly to the side. But as I started to turn it he forced my face back to press his lips against mine. Kissing me hard and painfully biting my lip making more blood come out with my lip starting to swell. His hand going up my shirt with his nails cutting my skin trying to push him off of me. So I could breath and get the blood out of my mouth he just grabbed my wrist and held my arm down starting to cut off the circulation through out my arm. Finally taking his lips from my and moving his mouth to my neck as I coughed up blood. Staining the white bed sheets with the red metallic blood that almost looking black in the light of the tv. Biting my neck hard enough to leave a bruise but not hard enough to draw blood. His body holding my other arm down against hm trying to pull my arm out from underneath him. He just grabbed it and held it down biting my shoulder hard.

    Talking to him that short amount of time brought all of those memories flooding back. Those feelings of him touching me and holding me down still come in the darks of my slumber. Still waking up in cold sweats sometimes screaming with hot tears burning down my cheeks. Sitting straight up clutching my covers and trying to get my vision to adjust. With my finger on the call button before I realize I’m still alone in my room and it was just another dream. Shaken up so badly I’m trembling holding my knees to my chest as I tear rolling down my cheeks.

    I was glad when my ptsd was no longer came as often as it did before. But now its just starting all over again I was doing good for the last two months before all of this. Now its just starting all over again I want to cut so bad right now just thinking about it now. Trying not to but this struggle is really hard.

  6. Hate_1301's Blog

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    Hate_1301
    Latest Entry
    Ive waited for life to get better.. Nothing is happening. I need to be dead…I want help but none of you can save me. They have tried saving me. its not worth it. im not worth it. My time is now. Bye 
  7. NewToItAll's Blog

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    NewToItAll
    Latest Entry

    I don’t know exactly how to go about this. I’m so new to this world. I’m afraid to come off like a poser, and I don’t know quite what I’m looking for. I have a phenomenal girl friend who also self-injures, but I can’t really talk about it with her. I’m concerned, and slightly scared for her reactions. She blames herself for the reason I’ve started cutting, and she fails to listen to anything I have to say to the contrary. I just want her to be okay. I don’t know how this site works exactly, and I’m probably going to have to figure it all out, but we’ll see what happens…

     

  8. Shippo704's Blog

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    Shippo704
    Latest Entry

    Once upon a time, a story started. It wasn’t a fairy tale, but a tale none the less. Being as it was, the story began once upon a time ago. It begins with a little girl who we can call Lyz.

    Lyz was a normal child, happy family, two younger brothers, extremely bright, had everything going for her. She was shy in front of peers and adults, but could do pretty much anything she set her mind to. Everything, that is, except make friends.

    From the beginning, Lyz was marked as an outsider. Every stereotype attached to gifted kids was her, including the difficulty interacting with her peers. This inability to interact, contrary to popular belief, doesn’t stem from inherent social awkwardness but actually stems from how she thinks. Most people will think one way about a particular topic, while Lyz will either have a different point of view based on specific observations, or will make odd connections due to a higher average level of thinking, essentially putting her beyond her peers.

    Kids notice when someone is different, and when someone is different, it doesn’t usually matter why. Why someone is different changes with every hurtful sentence that the children will throw at the one person, and is warped with every bruise the one child receives. Lyz was tormented by peers from the beginning of Kindergarten until beyond the end of her time in elementary school. Grades 1-3, it hurt, she cried, and her mom would give her a hug and say that things will get better, that the other students were just jealous. She believed. Grades 4-5, words weren’t enough for the bullies, as Lyz had learned to ignore what they’d say to her. They decided that they needed to hurt her physically, if words weren’t having an effect. “Aren’t bullies supposed to ignore you when you don’t fight back? Doesn’t just taking it make them lose interest?” Not a chance. It just makes it worse. Her mom said that the bullying could possibly have lasted for so many years, and that the injuries were fake, unworthy of attention, or histrionics. Even a broken finger went untreated. Lyz began debating the worth of a life at that time, but never went farther. She just waited out her time. Grades 6-8, Lyz was lonely. She felt unloved and unwanted. Her parents said that they loved her, provided everything that she needed, but they would never listen when she tried to tell them anything that they didn’t want to hear. The bullies broke bags, put garbage in her desks, destroyed homework and property, stole from her, and tormented her. She had no help. A few times, just to feel human, she’d purposely fall on the ground and scrape her knees, blood being proof of her life. Sometimes, she did have to wonder if she really wanted to be alive at all. After ten years with them, she at least didn’t have to see them every day any more.

    High school changed things. Lyz made sure that she went to a school where she wouldn’t know anyone, to make a fresh start, and it worked. None of the students at this school had any reason to mock her or do anything but give a friendly wave, a hello, a passing nod. She was very thankful, but at the same time confused. What was happening to her wasn’t normal for her, and she didn’t know how to react.

    She still had a hard time making friends, and couldn’t deal with the stress that she felt. Lyz needed a way to help herself because there was no one else who could. Not her parents, and not any new friends that she had made. What if they changed their minds about being friends when they heard about her fears or her past? Lyz didn’t know what to do, and suddenly found a strong urge to bite herself. So she did. The harder she bit, the more relaxed she felt, and the calmness drained away the anxiety that she had previously felt.

    In ninth and tenth grades, she experimented with different ways to produce that calming effect, beginning with rocks and pop tabs, then bumping things, punching herself, hitting her head against a wall, and finally found what she liked best: cutting. It started by dragging the corner of a metal ruler across the back of her leg and progressed to other tools.

    Lyz found a reliable method of dealing with stress, until it wasn’t so reliable anymore. The one problem that Lyz had with her coping methods were that they needed to be done in private. The suicidal thoughts that had been steadily growing since she was a child turned into an urge, a plague that wouldn’t leave her thoughts. She very nearly succeeded in attempting on afternoon, but there happened to be a six year old nearby. She didn’t think she could bear the weight of him on her conscience before she died, so she took the rope off of her neck, and climbed back down from the treehouse.

    Since then, she’s just been saying one more week, one more month, wait until I get my driver’s license, until I finish high school, until the end of summer, etc.

    She’s been living, dealing with new things that come up in her life, more things that separate her from the norm. She is not straight, she is in a different degree stream than anyone she had classes with in high school, she has interests that are considered stupid by her friends, and she also has a secret that no one can ever learn.

    Over all this time, she has learned many lessons, some easy and some hard. The one thing that she has learned out of all of this is that life is hard. Everyone takes the challenge differently, and everyone has their own shortcuts to help them get to the finish line, wherever it may lie. Each and every person has a path, some just need to keep it secret, and almost all will walk alone.

  9. lexi_ricci's Blog

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    lexi_ricci
    Latest Entry

    The beginning of a story.

    A story to sad to be told.

    Not new, but still not old.

    Beginning of a chapter, in my book of life.

    This chapter will be over before you know it.

    Here is the plot: he enters your life…

    He blows you away, He tells you he will stay.

    Hugs and kisses. Smiles and laughs.

    Shared together till one day:

    it all falls apart..

    Not the end, but pretty close.

    A tragedy worse than any Shakespeare could invent.

    Will this ending be happy or filled in remorse?

    What is left to make me feel worse?

    My heart is filled to the top with pain.

    I hope it will rain to mix with my tears.

    The dark already hides my fears. 

  10. Wounded Angel's Blog

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            Even though I only started self harming 2 months ago it has rapidly taken over my life. I don’t talk to any of my friends about it because they wouldn’t understand and my parents don’t know either. I am afraid to tell my parents because I think they would send me to a hospital of a therapist and I hate both of those things. I hate the self harm, but it is an addiction and it does help in the moment but after the fact it is just one more reason for me to insecure. I feel so trapped inside my own head and I am always so alone. None of my friends understand me anymore, even the one who self harms as well. I have been doing more and more over the past few weeks so me and my friend have devised a challenge: A three week no self harm challenge. We are starting small with the time and our challenge starts tomorrow and ends on the 18th of April. I hope I can make it…
  11. 5:25 PM

    The last time I wrote in my journal I was saying that I wanted to cut and that I didn’t know how much longer that I would be able to hold back from giving in and doing it.  Well, when I closed my journal from writing that night, I did it.  I used a razor, and I cut pretty deep.  Not as deep as I would have liked to, but it was deep.  Anyway, it’s still in the healing process. (I WISH JIM, MY NEIGHBOR, WOULD SHUT UP! HE’S SO LOUD!) At dinner this evening, Megan, another resident here, had a really bad attitude.  She apologized and said she was moody because her back was hurting, but it seems like during EVERY meal time, she has an attitude.  I don’t know what is going on with her, and it’s really none of my buisiness, but I am getting really tired of her drama and her attitude.  It’s not just Megan though.  It seems to me as if everyone here is dramatic and paranoid. Not to mention self-centered.  It’s as if everyone here only cares about themselves.  

    As for me: I don’t like dinner time, and every minute after dinner until I go to sleep at night.  I get angry, hopeless, depressed, ANXIOUS, and let’s just say I feel like crap.  It seems like during the day, I am fine and I have my goals and things I want to do.  Then, in the evening, I am a completely different person.  I feel as if I am a nobody.  Like I don’t give a care in the world what happens in my life.  I just turn into this MONSTER of a person who doesn’t give a care about nothing or no one.  Not even myself.  It doesn’t seem as if people understand.  No one is me, nor, is anyone walking in my shoes, in my life.  If there were someone, then MAYBE that person would understand.  But, that won’t and can’t happen.  Therefore, no one will EVER understand.

    INEEDTOFEEL2275

  12. AsiaKelsey's Blog

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    AsiaKelsey
    Latest Entry

    It was a Wednesday…Wednesday March 12 2014.

    That was yesterday. I was up all night looking for ways to come out to my mother, to tell her I was self harming. I was in the school parking lot the next day about to be dropped of when I finally got the courage to tell her. I cried. She looked at me and I couldn’t meet her gaze. She wasn’t disappointed, she knew exactly how I felt, in fact she’s dealing with these feelings now, but she restricted herself, she didn’t cut anymore. My mother has seasonal depression and social anxiety. I have severe social anxiety and very low self esteem. My mom told me that it was OK to have these feelings. For once I actually felt normal. I felt as if I belonged and as if for once a person WASN’T judging me which was a new feeling for me. We went home and ate breakfast and watched movies. She took me to a therapist at 4:00pm, she was a nice lady, she made me open up to her immediately (you obviously know I had to take a relaxation pill before I went their or I wouldn’t have spoken to the lady at all) My mom doesn’t give me anymore sympathy then she used to and I’m glad that our relationship hasn’t changed, if anything it’s grown STRONGER i stopped cuttingThats my self harm coming out story, i hope your parents are as understanding as my mother. Anyone else have any stories about telling their parents how they felt? 

  13. autismtwin's Blog

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    autismtwin
    Latest Entry

    It had almost been two months since we’ve talked to you. Two months ago, you were beginning to forget us and our relation to you. That’s what this disease is. You’ve lost more circulation in the last two months, more rapidly than ever before. You can die at anytime, but it looks like it won’t be too long before you’re gone. Before my world stops spinning. Apparently you’re always cold and your limbs are really bad. Doctor’s said that you’re too weak to make it through any surgery; that you wouldn’t make it out alive. I look at your picture all the time.. I miss you.

    Most of everything in my life right now is unhappy. She’s going to die; we’re waiting for that call. Going forward with my past trauma has been extremely stressful. I got a glimpse of what it’s going to be like when I press charges. I’ve gained weight because of my starving and binging. But I’m determined to losen it again. My relationship is falling apart and I have no energy for school stuff. I’ve cut in my sleep again.. and I’ve become increasingly suicidal.

    It’s awful. Because I used to be so active around this site. But I’ve closed myself off. I feel like I have to hide things in my blog posts these days and I guess that’s why I stopped posting. It’s pretty pathetic that I’m hiding stuff in my blog posts.

    My life isn’t important. Other people have it worse than I do.

    I feel like I have no-one to turn to. I feel like I’m partially screaming out yet not and no-one can hear me.

  14. brent_sweet_32's Blog

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    What to do, what to do? Can’t sleep, mind is racing, and my back is killing me. I have so many scars that I can’t self-harm anymore and I am so stressed out I’m literally ripping my hair out. My back has made me house bound for a year and nothing has worked even though I have tried everything. I have weighed the pros and cons of living and dying many times but the only thing that keeps me alive is a few family members and friends. I feel close to where I was 4 months ago when I was barely saved from my first suicide attempt. What to do, what to do?

  15. lilahrosee10123's Blog

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    lilahrosee10123
    Latest Entry

    These are just some things I’ve seen on the internet or written myself. 

     

    1. I hate doing this to myself

    it’s the only way to make me feel better though

    I try and try to stop

    but i’m just going to have more scars

    I don’t know how much longer until I just break

    I want to tell people, but I know they’re going to make a big deal out of it

    It gets my anger out at myself

    I know it’s not normal/right

    other people aren’t like this

    But I am and thats the way it is.

    People say I can get help, but I’m scared

     

    2. Why do I feel ignored?

    Aren’t i good enough?

    I can tell when people don’t like me 

    What did I do?

    Please tell me…

     

    3. Why am I like this?

    Why me?

    Why can’t I be pretty like her?

    Why can’t I be popular/liked?

    Why can’t I stop hating myself?

    Why?!?

    WHY ME?!?!

    Can’t I be someone else?

    Please?

    I hate myself and my life…

     

    4. Cutting doesn’t help your problem; only you can do that.

     

    5. Think before you say anything mean/might hurt someone. It only takes a few words to bring someone spiraling down. It will take a lifetime to bring one’s confidence back where it was before. 

     

    6. Being skinny isn’t worth starving yourself. If people want you to be skinnier, don’t listen to them. You’re beautiful just the way you are. You don’t need to change for anybody! If people want you to change for them, flick them off and walk away.

     

    7. Everywhere

    They’re everywhere

    No matter where I look

    I always see them

    Like a permanant “tattoo”

    I’ve learned to live with them

    I’ve stopped caring

    But they’re still everywhere, tempting me.

     

    8. Cutting 

    my way of dealing

    I know it’s wrong

    I know it’s not normal

    They make me feel better

    They make me feel “sane”

     

    9. I have battle wounds 

    From the civil war inside my head that makes me do things I don’t normally do. 

     

  16. Katie_Bearr's Blog

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    So … I can’t stop relapsing ._. My friend had gotten me to throw out all my razors but I uh … I got another one …. I just … Gahhhhhhhhhhh >,< What do I dooooooooooooooooooooooooo

  17. DemonbAs's Blog

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    DemonbAs
    Latest Entry
     my past is not a joke to me , i have been pushed around and abused all of my life , and i am only 14 years old . 
     what happed to me when i was 6 years old up to when i was 8 years old , my moms boyfriend raped me constantly , and when i would go over to my dads house for a visit , his roommate would molest me all the time . when my dad would get mad he would beat me with a fishing pole , it hurt like hell . 
     then when i was in 3rd grade up to 5th grade my "friends"  would always tell me how bad my hair would look and then pull it . sometimes when the teacher wasn't looking the other girls would trip me and laugh . one time one girl tripped me and i fell and hit my eye on the corner of a desk , i was stuck with a black eye for about a week and a half . those were just my elementary school years . 
     once i got to 6th grade i had to deal with being in the the younger class because when you are in 6th grade all the 7th and 8th graders mock you for no reason . i know all 6th graders go threw that pressure . but me even with that pressure the 7th and 8th graders would  tell me i am lame , stupid , fat , and ugly . every word would carve into me and it hurt but i delt with it . that is when i first started cutting . 
     when i got in 7th grade everything was good again , i had a great boyfriend and really good friends . after 3 months of the relationship with my boyfriend things changed a lot . he began to call me a slut and a bitch a lot then push me to the ground and hit me .i pushed on threw . 
     now here i am in my 8th grade year , things are better now , i have a new boyfriend of 2 months so far and he is great but just about a month ago i was on a walk then i was raped by some bastard in a mask . now my mother is saying it is my fault and his cutting me off from one of my best friends and is keeping me away from my boyfriend . the two most important people in my life have been ripped away from me and now my cutting is just out of control , i am not taking my medication like i should be becuase all it did was confuse me . i wonder what else awaites my worthless life .
    
           thanks for reading .
  18. Jessica_Lynn22's Blog

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    Jessica_Lynn22
    Latest Entry

    So just a little light on a matter.
    The subject: Cutting. 
    Everybody thinks cutting is a joke, right? No wrong. Cutting is very serious matter in our world. People get bullied daily, regardless of if it’s at home, or at school, their way to cope with being bullied, Cutting. They don’t do it for attention, they do it because they would rather inflict the pain everybody else is putting on them, themselves rather than have someone else put them through hell everyday. Half the people in this world can’t automatically point out a cutter, that’s because people who cut, hide their cuts. They don’t show anybody fearing others won’t understand their logic behind cutting themselves. Fearing that they’ll be judged every single day, and if someone finds out that person cuts, they are in fact judged. Or classified as suicidal. Thats not okay. I don’t care who you are, you have no right to judge a person because they cut. Before you judge a cutter, think about this. Celebrities cut. I can name a few that have in fact cut themselves before.
    1: Johnny Depp, Drew Barrymore, Russell Brand, Megan Fox, Angelina Jolie, Demi Lovato, Amy Winehouse, Marilyn Manson, Princess Diana,and Jacoby Shaddix.
    All these celebrities have cut themselves. And yet we still love them, so instead of judging a cutter, love them. Thats all they really want, someone who will stick by their sides. Someone that will tell them they love them everyday so they have a reason to continue hanging on. Someone that won’t judge them and call them names because they self harm. 
    Everybody has a story, take time to learn theirs before you judge them.. 
    Take my advice. <3 I hope I touched someones heart today about self harm because I am so tired of people in our society getting judged because they self harm. Enough is enough. Take a stand for what you believe in, thats what I’m doing. I don’t “believe” in self harm, I don’t think its right but if thats what you do instead of doing something worse, I have to say I’d rather you do that then do something major… Just a thought loves.

  19. justaquietgirl's Blog

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    justaquietgirl
    Latest Entry

    I’ve suffered from self harm thoughts for as long as I can remember, I have also had issues eating since I was very young.
    I used to watch diet shows, tag along to weight loss clubs with my mum and when I was 8 I stopped eating properly, I used to hold in my stomach and eat next to nothing in school. when I turned 10, I remember standing playing with a knife debating if i would be missed, i also had thoughts of jumping down the stairs. This progressed and a few years back i took a lot of pills and downed some alcohol but it wasn’t enough, i shacked a lot for a couple of days though. I lost so much weight last year i fainted a lot and still do. I ended up smoking at a point also which i’m ashamed of. Iused to cut my feet and watch it bleed down the plughole… lately these thoughts have all been coming back and i cut a tinny bit again. I dont trust anyone and i dont know what to do anymore… i need them to go away or im scared it’ll get too much. 

  20. GwenElaine's Blog

    GwenElaine
    Latest Entry

    its so strange- this website has changed since the last time ive been on here. ive changed too but i guess not by much

    last wednesday i cut for the first time since last june. that’s seven months i was fine and now i can’t seem to bring myself back anymore. i spent an entire week just feeling so off that i didn’t know what to do. i still don’t know because ive been crying for the last twenty minutes looking for someone to talk to

    the thign is that i do ahve people to talk toi could talk to my best friend divya or justin or my mom or call someone or anyone and theyd listen but a part of me just can’t because i just can’t do this anymore so here i am typing this out like someone will actually read it i don’t know hwat to do anymore

    i want to run away thats what i want to do but i ahve about two dollars to my name i want to leave connecticcut and just get on the train to somewhere and figure my life out over there ihate living here i don’t go anywhere there’s ntohign here fo rme anymore im going to fail out of high school so basically fuck college even thoguh i need to get accepted to a unviersity to graduate but thats not going to happen not whne i ca’t bring myslelf to do any actual school work

    ill go to washington and live in a small town on the shore ill find somewhere to live for a while adn get a job somewhere and just leave because i hate it here i hate my family i hate this house i hate this state i hate me i hate who i am when i think about it here i don’t want to die but i dotn want to exist anymroe not here 

    god i hsould be fucking admitted becasue im fucking insane i cant od this anyoore

    i was rereading my old blog posts frmo lsat year and they were all so sarcastic and cynical and i ended each one with ‘stay strong’ but i was such a fucking hyprocite i told peopole to stay stron gand not follow examples but im here wondering if ghosts are real so i can stay here without being here at the same time im drwoning and sufofcating at the same time and id not know how to stop it i was so fucking stupid what gives me the right to tell epople to stay storng when ic ant even stay stron gmyself i cant motivate myself to actually fucking do smething but imt elling people how to keep going im givbing advice like i actually fcuking have a clue abotu what to do in a bad situation id on’t know how o thelp you if you miss the boyfriend who raped you i don’t care if you dont liek this girl or hta tgirl or that boy i dont’ give a fuck and id on’t know how to help you so stp ufkcing coming ot me i can thelp you i cant help me why would i kno whow ot hlep you

  21. cinderellaa55dd93d20f127cae3's Blog

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    So, I know what it’s like. I’ve been there before and I’m still crawling out of that hole. I know you’ve heard this before, but you can’t even begin to understand how sincere I am about this. I want to help you. Talk to me, I have dirrect messaging enabled so please talk to me. I am a proud person of 54 days clean. All it took was one person who made me talk to them. To be honest, it’s been the hardest 54 days of my like. And I know it’s hard to talk about it, but it helps. And I want you to know that you are amazing, and beautiful, or handsome, whatever floats your boat. I want to make you believe in yourself. Because I do. I believe in you. I believe that you can find other ways instead of self harm. I believe that you are smart, and can pass that test. I believe that you are talented and can get the lead role. I believe that you are special and can make the bestest of friends. I believe you are one of a kind and can date that boy/girl. I believe that you are strong, strong enough to not self harm. I have a kik: sarah__bear99. Kik me anytime you need. I want to hear your problems, I can promise you that you won’t be complaining. I want to help, I am honestly begging you to let me hear you. I want to help. If you want to you don’t even have to talk about your problems, we can just talk about anything and everything. I am here for your entertainment. I’m here, for you. 

  22. So, it’s been a really long time since I’ve been on this site. I reread the things I had posted about three years ago and I can’t even believe how much things have changed. When I joined this site I was 15 or 16 years old, I was very depressed and dealing with an addiction to cutting myself and harming myself in any way. I am now 19 years old, I’ve been in recovery for a year and a half, I can’t say that I’m fully recovered but I’m a lot better. I have a tattoo covering some of my older scars, and some days I don’t even know they’re there. It’s a great feeling not being ashamed of your skin, to not worry about people noticing your scars or cuts. Even the scars that aren’t covered, I don’t care if people see them. I have never had someone since I’ve been out of high school even comment on them. I wear them as a badge of honor, I made it through something that some people can’t even imagine.

    I just want to let everyone know that there is light at the end of the tunnel, you won’t suffer forever. I battled with self-harm for 11 years, from the age of 7 to 18. I no longer cut myself, I don’t need to purge or bruise myself to get through the day. I just want you to know that you won’t be stuck in this darkness forever. We are all warriors, we have battle scars, we can conquer anything. Don’t give up, even if you feel like there is no hope, just hold on.

    My love and thoughts go out to anyone still struggling with self-harm, depression, anxiety, eating disorders, or anything that is causing you pain. <3

     

     

  23. BlueRose_19212
    Latest Entry

    You were my friend. I wanted to help you. Why did you hurt me? You asked me if I was gay. I told you no. You told me you loved me. You were afraid you had scared me away but I stayed, because we were friends. Because I knew coming out is hard. So I stayed. I shouldn’t have stayed. You tried to change my answer when you asked me if I was gay. You slammed me against the wall in the back hall at school. My body hurt from where it hit the bricks. The bruises hurt. I kept thinking it was my fault. I didn’t want to tell anyone. I knew it was hard for you coming out. So I stayed. You held me down when I came to your house. You held onto my wrist and ankle so tight. I hid the bruises. I didn’t want to tell anyone. I knew coming out was hard for you. So I stayed. You pressed your lips to mine and I couldn’t move with your weight on top of me. You were almost a foot taller and you weighed fifty pounds more. I couldn’t get away so I just turned my head and shut my eyes. You didn’t like that. You growled and pulled my face back towards yours. I just shut my eyes tight and tried my best to be somewhere else. It was hard to breathe. Months later after I finally got away and still nobody knows the entire story. It’s still hard to breathe. I feel so trapped. I can’t get away. The memories still hurt and now I hear you’ve hurt someone else. And there’s not a thing I can do. I feel so trapped. I was laying on the couch with my boyfriend watching a movie last night and all of a sudden I was back in that room with you. I was trapped with no way out and I couldn’t breathe. I had to go home. I can’t get away from you no matter how much I try. No matter how long after I will still be able to feel you holding me down. I will still feel your weight presses down on top of me. I will still hear you growl at me in anger when I turn my head. I will still be able to smell you so close to me. I will forever be trapped. I can’t stay with him now. I feel trapped. I remember. I can’t be with anyone. It hurts. I get scared. All I want to do is shut my eyes and try to be somewhere else.

  24. Overtherainbow222's Blog

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    Overtherainbow222
    Latest Entry

    Sometimes I get in to this mind set that everyone hates me. That I’m unloved and unwanted… The academic part of me tries to convince myself that that’s not true, but the feeling still doesn’t go away. I cut. I’ve been cutting for a while. In all honesty the few times that I am not cutting, it’s because I know I’m going to he in a situation that someone might see if I have fresh cuts… But I feel the need to all the time. I also feel all of this guilt for cutting… My life isn’t as bad as a lot of people. I have two parents that love me I’ve never been raped or molested. I should be grateful. I’ve lost a lot of close family members in my life as well as struggled with health and bullies. But I should just get over it right? My life isn’t that bad. So what if a couple guys have lied cheated and taken advantage of me? I probably deserved it? Idk I just go in to this funk and have no one to talk to because I doubt anyone would get it… I just honestly need someone to talk to that won’t walk out on me like so many other people have…

  25. Brokenmoon
    Latest Entry

    A new year is closer. This brings no hope for me, for every year is just the same. Adding more of a decline in my health each time. I have to host an exchange student for two weeks soon, so I’m stressing. It’ll interfere with my SI, my only coping strategy. But after they are gone, I’m going to start saying goodbye to people. I’m getting dangerous and I’m out of control. I can honestly say I don’t think I’m going to make it through 2014.

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Welcome to self-injury.net. We are a support community for self-harmers and also provide information on self-harm, creative works, media lists, lists of resources (helplines, textlines, mental health apps, therapists, etc.), etc. We focus on self-injury but a number of other mental health issues are included.

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  • self-injury.net
  • Founded
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  • self-injury.net is a self-harm community and resource founded in 1999. Provides support, resources, and information on self-harm.
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    Draco Malfoy Draco Malfoy
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