Pain without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
You're sick of feeling numb
You're not the only one
I'll take you by the hand
And I'll show you a world that you can understand
This life is filled with hurt
When happiness doesn't work
Trust me, and take my hand
When the lights go out, you'll understand
Author Three Days Grace
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Two years I've been in recovery from self-harm.
I don't think I can last another day honestly. More recently, every time I've been getting angry or upset, I just want to hurt myself all over again. Well that would be two years wasted!! I can't stop the thoughts. I can't. They're literally consuming my brain more and more everyday. Just waking up is a struggle. Sleeping is even a chore for me now. I just want to hurt myself so badly because at least before when I did that, I didn't feel depressed or pain. When I used to hurt myself, I felt invigorated and a lot happier. I don't get it. What's wrong with me? Why doesn't therapy help? Nothing helps me anymore!!! I am so afraid I'll relapse. I can't do it though. I've worked so hard to get here. I just don't think I can take it anymore though. I want--- no, I need to hurt myself.
Please, help me.
I don't know what to do.
i am a cutter, i dont deserve anything. that's what running on my head whenever i think of myself.
i need attention and care from the people that i love but..
how do i tell them? i am afraid if they were gonna hate me, judge me, making jokes about me and just push me away.
what if people get scared of me? what if they laughs? will everything be the same and gets normal again?
theres a lot of thoughts running on my head. thats the reason why i never tell anyone. like no one. i just dont have trustworthy toward people anymore...
Hey, there's not much to say but I'm pretty deep into my own head. Is there anything wrong you may ask, anything that drove you to self-harm. No, not really. I just don't really care about my life anymore. I feel so shitty about nothing that I would rather cut myself to not feel these emotions.
By Draco Malfoy
But you’re a bag of warm fluid
You’re the corpse in the class
You walk so near to your locker
You lay so low in the grass
Did you get that coat from the principal?
Did you get that bruise on the bus?
You should wash your hair more
You should look more like us.
i had a dream that i was fine
i wasn't crazy
i was divine
-- lana del rey