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Content tagged 'Broken'

Found 14 results


  1. in Daily Life

    I am so broken and alone. I have completely relapsed in my Self Harm. I told a friend and she talked me through it but she lives so far away. I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to disappoint my mom and daddy anymore. I am nothing but a disgusting, worthless, failure and I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to go through life worring about ever little detail. I want to get better. I just don't know how.

  2. in Daily Life

    Yesterday I did something I promised I would not do anymore. I cut. my sisscors were right there and I felt so so alone. In the end instead of being strong I cut. 3 cuts on my right arm not even that big but enough to make me feel so ashamed. I honestly feel so alone. My best friend hasn't talked to me in a long time, my family is busy with their own lives, and I have no one. I don't want to be reliant on self harm but it feels so good to see the blood pool. 

  3. I have never told anyone that I cut myself, and I don't plan to anytime in the near future.
    Why not, you may be asking? Well, the answer is simple -- I don't want anyone to know that I self harm.
    I have had a bad experience with people finding out that I self harm...
    The only time anyone has found out that I self harm was accidental (sort of). I did not tell them that I self harmed. I used to hide my self harm tools and first aid kit in my backpack, and when my sisters were going through my stuff, they found my first aid kit and a few of my tools. They decided that it would be a good idea to hide my first aid kit, and dispose of the tools that they found. That same day, I walked into my room and opened up my backpack to see if my first aid kit and tools were still there (I regularly check to see if they're there), and they were missing! When I found out that my first aid kit had gone missing, I kind of freaked out.
    My sisters had been following me, and they saw my reaction to finding my first aid kit gone. I was freaking out, and they could tell. One of my sisters must've though that my reaction was hilarious, because I could see that she was suppressing a laugh, and trying not to smile. Then, she said, "What's wrong, are you freaking out because we hid your f***ing cutting first aid kit and tools? Cutter-Bitch!" My response to that was, "stealing bitch!" Heck, she did STEAL my tools and first aid kit....
    They now know that I'm a cutter. They must see me as a freakish attention seeker or something. I know that they see themselves as being "above" me, because I self harm and they do not, and I can just tell (I am very good at reading the emotions of others). I saw it for days after they found out, they just treated me differently. They treated me as if I was some kind of alien. They left me out of things. They just acted as if they were so much better than me.
    And it hurt. It hurt my heart, it hurt my emotions. It destroyed any trust that I once had in people. I don't trust anyone anymore.
    It hurt me so much emotionally that I needed that same release that I get from self harm. I turned back to self harm almost immediately, and it has gotten worse and worse.  I was desperate to start self harming again, especially since my emotions had been hurt so badly by my sisters. And I did. I managed to find all of the items from my first aid kit, along with one of the tools that they SAID were disposed of (a disposable razor that I assume was going to be used for its intended purpose of shaving leg hairs)... And I went to the Family Dollar store to buy me some more tools. I also found extra first aid kit items, and some more disposable razors (that were in the bathroom, in the package, for months before the incident of my sisters hiding my tools ever happened) were added to my tool collection.
    Ever since my sisters found out that I cut myself, and then proceeded to take away my tools and first aid kit, my self harm has been getting worse. It has, in a way, "fueled" the urge to harm myself. It sent me on a frenzy to replace the tools and first aid kit that had been stolen from me. I bought even more tools and found even more first aid kit items, which then allowed me to self harm more often and worse. I used to self harm sporadically, but now I self harm at least once a week, if not more. I used to make very shallow cuts, but now I cut deeper. I was trying to recover from self harm, but now I have almost completely given up on my recovery.
    If my sisters had never taken away my tools and first aid kit, I might have made it to one month clean. I was trying so hard to stop myself from cutting, and I WAS succeeding in my efforts. But then, my sisters had to come along and ruin everything - by messing with my emotions (by taking away my tools, they screwed up my emotions), calling me names, treating me as if I'm lower than them, etc.. I know that they were NOT trying to ruin my efforts in recovery. They probably thought that they were HELPING me in my recovery, in the only way they knew how, which was to take away ALL of my tools (it makes sense in a way, no more tools, no more cutting, they must've thought). But, their efforts to make me go "cold turkey" on cutting, just made everything worse.
    To this day, I do not trust any of my family members with any of my secrets. Especially those two sisters - I don't trust them at all anymore. They went through my stuff, which should not have happened anyway. Sisters just don't go through other sister's stuff like that, ESPECIALLY a backpack. (Heck, if you're going to go through my backpack, why not just do my homework for me?) They went through my backpack BEFORE school even started. Usually, people don't have school supplies in their backpacks until after they go shopping for school supplies... Well, we did go school shopping - before my sisters went through my backpack. I guess they must have been going through my backpack to steal some of my empty notebooks or something, and they just happened to find my cutting supplies... :/
    Oops :/ I guess. That will never happen again, thank goodness! It CAN'T happen again because I am a senior in high school, and I plan on moving out after I graduate from high school(or if I'm desperate to get out of the house, I'll move out when I turn 18, which will happen before graduation day). 
    That means that I won't have any nosy little sisters going through my stuff before school starts, like they did this school year. Yay!
    I do not plan on telling any of my family members that I self harm. Ever. Just a bad idea, if you knew what my family is like. ): 
    But, I DO plan on telling my future husband that I self harm. Hopefully, I will tell him that I self harm BEFORE we get married, perhaps when we are engaged. I want my marriage to built on trust, and that includes telling him that I self harm. (I do not want my husband to find out that I self harm on our wedding night, and have him be all like, "Where did you get all those scars? Why didn't you tell me this before?" That would be so awkward. It could possibly destroy trust in the marriage relationship.)
    • 0 replies

  4. After she’s caught in the school bathroom cutting herself with the blade from a pencil sharpener, fifteen-year-old Kenna is put under mandatory psychiatric watch. She has seventy-two hours to face her addiction, deal with rejection, and find a shred of hope.
    • 0 replies

  5. in dead_inside7154aea3ced0d47d1's Blog

    A while back my English teacher made us write poems and at one in the morning the night before they were due i wrote about the only thing on my mind… my precious blade. I remember writing about how the blade can’t control me anymore. I remember writing about how I’m worth more than a stupid piece of metal, but now 3 month later i find myself with the blade in my hand almost every night. The thing is the blade is the only thing I have at 2 am where all I wanna do is cry. I’m sick of needing the blade but if the blade whats keeping me alive then the blade is gonna be my best friend for a while I guess

  6. in Lena Lyric's Blog

    i’m a broken girl. 
    People see my smile, they think im happy.
    That smile was made from my self destruction.
    I cry out for a savior every single day. But people can”t see the hurt behind my eyes.
    I want to stop these thoughts, I just wish I could feel pretty, or at leat feel happy. 
    What does happineness even feel like, I can’t remember.
    Does it pour into your body like carbon monoxide?
    I woudn’t know but I bet the feeling is to die for.
    My head is filled with so many thought, None of them being good.
    You see i’m just that broken girl no body wants to be friends with. The wierd girl that has scars all over her arms and legs. You know that feeling where you are just so overwelmed with life that you can hardly breath. I wish I could feel something other than that. I jusy want, well I don’t even know. I just want to be happy. I want to smile a real smile, and learn how to truly laugh again.
    But i can’t do that, not with these thoughts and scars
    They haunt me where I go
    I always feel like people are going to judge me, like they always have
    I’m just scared, I don’t know why
    Hell I don’t even know what i’m scared of. 
    Myself maybe….
    I’m scared of what i might do. 
    Or what i’m capable of.
    I don’t even have control of myself anymore.
    I just want to be normal.

  7. Hello im new my names katie im 16 and i cut myself. Ive cut my self since i was 8, i was abused by my mom, meaning she threw me up aginst doors and glass and choked me. i was also molested by my brother HELP

  8. in BlackTshirtFan's Blog

    Such a lovely
    Little weapon.
    You can hand
    It out to have
    It stolen and
    Broken. You
    Can hide it
    In your
    Coffin until
    You go to your
    Grave. Take it,
    And have it
    Forever. Break
    It, and it will
    Never be repaired.
    Come one,
    Come all,
    For it never

  9. I don’t even know what to write. I wrote everything out on a different self harm website, and I don’t really know what to put here. So, here’s teh gist of it: I’m Ireland with my mom (who is old and preppy and weird and annoying), I can’t talk to my friends, and I’ve been picking open my… cuts? They used to be masquito bites, but I’ve opened them up and let them bleed so many times I don’t even know what to call them now. I also used the B&B keys to scratch, and that’s helped a bit.
    God, I don’t even know why I’m even depressed. I have a really good life, more or less, and I’m all depressed and sh*t. Why the hell is that? I know that clinical depressing runs in the family (I got tested and lied during all of it), but I don’t know how to bring up getting tested again with admitting that I’m still self mutilating. What the f**k?

  10. in Hidden Blog

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  11. My heart bleeds no more;
    now, it’s been turned to stone.
    Your stomach feels sick for someone else.
    I’ve broken both my legs falling for you.
    Drag me on the ground.
    Powerless I stand, tarnished blade, cutting through, pushed into my vein.
    Blood still stains my hands.
    Sharpening my sense of pain outside
    My heart bleeds no more;
    now, it’s been turned to stone.
    Your stomach feels sick for someone else.
    I’ve broken both my legs falling for you.
    Drag me on the ground.
    Killing everything off inside.
    Make sense of everything you tried to hide,
    hide from me.
    My heart bleeds no more;
    now, it’s been turned to stone.
    My stomach feels sore from cutting up.
    I ruined all my sanctity for you.
    Smash me on the ground.
    I wanted to,
    convince myself there’s nothing else to do.
    I wanted to.
    Provide you with proof of what you put me through.
    I wanted to.
    Pretend that it was you.
    ‘you’re the worst thing that’s ever happened to me’
    Killing everything off inside.
    Make sense of everything you tried to hide,
    hide from me.
    My heart bleeds no more;
    now, it’s been turned to stone.
    Your stomach feels sick for someone else.
    I’ve broken both my legs falling for you.
    Smash me on the ground.
    • 0 replies

  12. I’m living in an empty room
    With all the windows smashed
    And I’ve got so little left to lose
    That it feels just like I’m walking on broken glass.
    • 0 replies

  13. My soul is a broken field
    plowed by pain.
    • 0 replies

  14. in Quotes

    When your life is never what you wanted
    Not even halfway normal
    Just tarnished and soiled
    When in your reach
    A framed and frozen moment
    So far from perfection
    Not truth or transcendence
    Will set you free
    Still you don’t believe.
    • 0 replies

About Us

Welcome to self-injury.net. We are a support community for self-harmers and also provide information on self-harm, creative works, media lists, lists of resources (helplines, textlines, mental health apps, therapists, etc.), etc. We focus on self-injury but a number of other mental health issues are included.


Draco Malfoy