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  1. Why do I self-harm?

    I self harm because it's my way of coping. While others eat their stress out, sleep their problems away, and such, I self-harm. Because that's mydesperate way of transferring the throbbing pain I feel in my chest to anywhere else.
  2. Trapped

    Today has been a terrible day, I went crazy and lost it. I haven't lost it in months and something inside me today snapped. I cut myself and punched myself until I was sick. I'm 25 year old and suffer with Borderline Personality Disorder. I hate having an explanation as to why I do what I do. I hate people saying ''Well it's because she's got 'Borederline'I just want to be normal and thinklogically and realistically. I want to be able to process my thoughts and feelings without feeling like I need to kill myself every time I do. I'm so tired of being sad and angry, I'm tired of crying. I'm tired of being empty. I despise looking at my body cut open and black and blue from bruises, I hate covering myself up, I hate people asking how I got my injuries, I hate making up stupid excuses as to how I got my injuries. Why don't I just tell people, ''I hack at myself with really sharp objects orI punch myself until I'm physically sick, I smash my head off walls to escape my thoughts, I cut my arms to release all the pressure built up inside'...Imagine the look on peoples faces if they knew? The pain is bittersweet, i love the feeling of being set free every time I self harm, that freedom, that control.I love the feeling of escaping from that cage that I built myself in my own mind, that cage that keeps me trapped inside a mind that I can't control. The feeling after that cut or punch, it elevates me and takes me higher. Higher than all the pain and sorrow, my mind is free towander and do what it likes because nothing else really matters.It would seem however every time I escape this cage something claws me back inside, I don't know I'm there until it's too late and I'm trying to escape again. I'm in pain right now, my heart is hurting really bad and I don't really know what to do, I've never blogged before properly and I don't really know what I'm doing but please if there is anybody out there who can just give me a few words of wisdom or maybe share your stories with me and mine with you, I'm so lonely and lost, I feel as though I have nothing in this world and If I had the courage I definitely wouldn't be here.
  3. And here is the shock – when you risk it, when you do the right thing, when you arrive at the borders of common sense and cross into unknown territory, leaving behind you all the familiar smells and lights, then you do not experience great joy and huge energy. You are unhappy. Things get worse. It is a time of mourning. Loss. Fear. We bullet ourselves through with questions. And then we feel shot and wounded. And then all the cowards come out and say, ‘See, I told you so.’ In fact, they told you nothing.
  4. Quote from Nicholas Nickleby [2002]

    In every life, no matter how full or empty ones purse, there is tragedy. It is the one promise life always fulfills. Thus, happiness is a gift, and the trick is not to expect it, but to delight in it when it comes, and to add to other peoples store ofit.
  5. life

    Hi,my name is aria as you already know.Well recently i have been having a tough time during the holidays, on thursdayi was at the orthadontistto my new braces but they made me look so stupid/ridiculous which set me off self harming again.I really cant do it anymore and have recently have started having sucicidal thoughts and self harming 2 or 3 times a day quite badly and this blog is the only thing that keeps going because i cant talk to any of my friends or family as most dontknow and the rest just would notunderstand. please help i realy do not know what todo??.
  6. Ayumu Shiiba is studying for the all-important high school entrance exams. She is struggling to get by, but thankfully has help from her best friend Shii-chan, who is at the top of their class. Test results come back and their friendship falls apart when Ayumu surpasses Shii-chan’s scores and gets into her high school of choice while Shii-chan doesn’t! Losing Shii-chan is so painful for Ayumu that she starts cutting her wrists for comfort. Hoping for a fresh start, Ayumu arrives at her new high school and finally opens up to a new friend, Manami. But will Manami prove to be the friend that Ayumu truly needs or send her further in a downward spiral? You can read the manga online HERE
  7. Quote from The Tent by Margaret Atwood

    I’m working on my own life story. I don’t mean I’m putting it together; no, I’m taking it apart.
  8. Quote from Crave by Sarah Kane

    The spine of my life is broken.
  9. My future just seems pointless...

    The more I sit here and think to myself of what I could do with my life, I seem to be finding more and more reasons of why I can't do that or why I wouldn't be able to. I shut myself down. I have no motivation for anything. I tell myself that nobody really cares, but I know some do. I think of all the negative things, as many as I possibly can. I give myself all the pain. I know I shouldn't do it. But that's just how I am. So I can't see my future being all bright and shiny like I want to, it just looks dark and dull. Pointless and pathetic...
  10. its not happily ever after?

    You think you know someone? and yeah Idont. I got some good advice for you that are not sure about the one you are dating or you got a crush on. Look for SIGNS. Bad signs , they are there„ just when you are in love you dont see them. You see the good in people and ignore the bad ones, thinking Oh well it will get better. It wont, probably wont. I hope that advice can help some others from getting hurt asme. Feels good to write it out and just try to pour out every inch of feelings , hurt, disapointment, sadness,anger,
  11. I dont know what to write in here but ommm… i tell something about myself first? Im 14 old girl i have depression and anxiety. ive cutted for 2years and ive been bullied for 8 years. i stopped cutting cause i just wanted to get my life in control. I got new friends who got so important to me that i could tell everything to them and suddenly i felt so much better. i thought my depression was gone but i realized its just hiding and waiting…Few days ago i lost some of my best friends, only people i could trust, and now theyre gone becuse they think i stole from them… but life goes on.. or does it? i havent cut for a while but i just think my depression is coming back… i just feel like it all the time. i learned that i shouldnt trust people so easily so i think im just trying to keep it all inside and write it in this blog. I have bad english sorry aboutthat.
  12. growing up?

    This is just a little rant, I feel better after I write or rant about what is on my mind. I have a hard time talking to people about what goes through my head because honestly its frightening.. I truely believe that the monsters that use to live under our beds havent never really lived there they have always been in our heads. Always. We are the worst creatures on the planet. We destory the beauty, we make people feel they are not good enough, we bully, we judge, we hate, we push people away. We are our own worst enemy. We continue to want or look for something more and something better than what we already have. We push away the people that mean and care about the most about us, for what? Why do we push people away? Why do we always want more? Why are we always looking for more? Why cant we just see what is right infront of our faces! The most beautiful and amazing people are out there and what are we doing, we are being shy, looking for more and beingselfish. I can honestly admit that I am my own worst enemy. I always have been and probably always will be. I am guilty of every single one of those things I have mentioned above. I have had the best people in my life, and I have pushed them away.. Why? Because I wanted more, I did not think they were what I wanted. When in fact they were everything I wanted and more. He was my bestfriend, my boyfriend, my lover, my companion, my everything.. And I let him go because I wanted more. I did not accept who he is. I always wanted more from him, I wanted him to stopdoing the things that made him, well him. After being with other people I have not realized how much you can miss one person… How doing the simplest things like driving, could make me think of how amazing he is. He will always be my number one. Forever andalways. I’ve never been a very secure girl, but with him I was comfortable, with him I felt on top of the world. He made all my insecurities go away when we were together, I was beautiful, I was sweet, I was everything I wanted to be when I was with him. Now that is all gone. Maybe he was meant to come into my life to teach me that not everything can go my way, or maybe it was to show me how amazing people are. Whatever he was in my life for I wish he was still. Its not that he is gone completely he will never be gone. Although he has moved on and is happier than ever, and I love seeing him happy and smiling with his soon to be family. ( Pregnant Girlfriend ) I just wish I could be the reason. I wish I could be the one to put that smile on his face. I wish I was the girl who he called beautiful, and babe, and gorgeous. I will never feel the love I had for him with anyoneelse. Its not that I havent moved on. I have been with two people since him. Hey its been a year and a half that we havent been together. It is just every time I think I have gotten over him, our song plays, or I see a picture of him, someone says his name, I see him in my dreams, I feel him with me. But his not. His not with me, and maybe I sound obsessive or like a crazy ex girlfriend. But maybe he is my soul mate, maybe he isnt. Does anyone believe in soul mates anymore? I feel something with him.. I feel forever when I am in his arms. It makes it hard to be with anyone when all you can think about is him. I wouldnt say I am miserable. No I am not miserable. There is just nights much like tonight that make it so hard to be happy knowing he isnt mine anymore. Knowing he is starting his life with someone else. Knowing he is fine without me, while I can’t even look at his picture without feeling like I want tocry. Its hard to let go of someone who helped you through so much. Everytime I feel sad I just want to run to him. I want him to take away the pain, the urge to cut, the sadness, and darkess. I just want him to make me feel safe again in those arms of his. He had a way with words that just made it soo easy to open up to him and talk to him. Have you ever had a person who makes you so incredible happy but is always the reason for your pain? That is him. His is my pain, but he is also my hero<3
  13. My life is great, why do I cut?

    I have been cutting for about a year now. When I first started, I wanted an image. I wanted to look and be like a cutter. I was excited to have a future with scars on my arms. I know what you are probably thinking, “another attention whore! She probably cuts for Bieber” I kind of started realizing after awhile of this “reputation” thing, when and why I was doing it. Whenever I would get into an argument with my mom/dad/sister/teacher/etc. I would cut. Whenever people tell me mean things, or how disappointed they are in me. For about 2-3 months I was doing it for a reputation. Then for about 6-7 months I did it because of pain, and how upset I was with myself and the people around me. Now I am back to the whole “reputation” idea, and it scares me. I am scared about why I would want this reputation. Does anyone have any clue why I would do this for attention? I don’t want anyone to find out until later though. Until I am fully healed, and not doing it anymore. If I think “I am doing this for attention”I remind myself “If you were doing it for attention everyone would know you cut, you wouldn’t mind showing off your healed legs, and you wouldn’t be scared as hell if people knew.”Please help, I really want to know if anyone else has been through this situation. I feel like I might be bipolar, because of the 2-3 months of reputation, were also 2-3 months of relatively happiness. While the 6-7 months were relatively sadness and worthlessness. I think I suppress a lot of feelings as well. For example when I was little, my mom got a rare syndrome called Cushingsdisease/syndrome (google it), and she had two tumors. During that time I wasn’t scared or worried at all, but I got something called shingles (also google it if you don’t know what that is), which is VERY rare in children. Mostly found in 60 year olds and up! It is brought on by stress, which in my mind, I had none of, AT ALL. Since I may be suppressing some of my feelings, I might be cutting for a deeper reason that I have no idea about, and am replacing the actual reason for doing it, with the thoughts that is is for a reputation. Sorry if that is confusing, but once again, tell me what you think, or if you have ever been in a similar situation! Thank you so, so much. Have a wonderful day:) Stay strong<3
  14. stumbled upon

    So I’m not realy one to recommened songs for people to listen to but the beet and lyrics in this song that I stumbeled on a few mins ago. I liked the lyrics though its upsetting it holds a meaning behind them and that’s what I love about music when the song and words in its self hold more of a meaning then what most songs seem tonow. ———————————————————————————————————————— Veer union- the world Iwanted The world I wanted Is drowing me Can you see inside my bloodshot eyes? One step closer to the dream that dies I search for the strength To release my rage But my minds bolted down Inside this cage SO HOW CAN I GO ON? Is there anything left for me? Is there anything left to see? This world I’ve wanted Is drowning me Is there anything to be? Is there anything to breathe? This world I wanted Is drowning me My life of colur Turns to shades of gray Slowly my soul Strips away from me SO HOW CAN I GO ON? Is there anything left for me? Is there anything left to see? This world I wanted Is drowning me Is there anything left to be? Is there anything left to breathe? This world I wanted Is drowning me I keep holding on I’ve must still believe I’ve been trying and trying For so long I keep holding on I’m still incomplete I’ve been trying and trying For so long I’ve been trying and trying For so long Is there anything left for me? Is there anything left to see? This world I’ve wanted Is drowning me Is there anything left to be? Is there anything left to breathe? This world I wanted Is drowningme—
  15. my nr fav song when im depressed

    Help, I have done it again I have been here many times before Hurt myself again today And, the worst part is there’s no-one else toblame Be my friend Hold me, wrap me up Unfold me I am small And needy Warm me up And breatheme Ouch I have lost myself again Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found, Yeah I think that I might break I’ve lost myself again and I feelunsafe Be my friend Hold me, wrap me up Unfold me I am small And needy Warm me up And breatheme Be my friend Hold me, wrap me up Unfold me I am small And needy Warm me up And breatheme
  16. Quote from East of Eden by John Steinbeck

    I believe that there is one story in the world, and only one, that has frightened and inspired us, so that we live in a Pearl White serial of continuing thought and wonder. Humans are caught—in their lives, in their thoughts, in their hungers and ambitions, in their avarice and cruelty, and in their kindness and generosity too—in a net of good and evil. I think this is the only story we have and that it occurs on all levels of feeling and intelligence. Virtue and vice were warp and woof of our first consciousness, and they will be the fabric of our last, and this despite any changes we may impose on field and river and mountain, on economy and manners. There is no other story. A man, after he has brushed off the dust and chips of his life, will have left only the hard, clean questions: Was it good or was it evil? Have I done well—or ill?
  17. You want a physicist to speak at your funeral. You want the physicist to talk to your family about the conservation of energy, so they will understand that your energy has not died. You want the physicist to remind your sobbing mother about the first law of thermodynamics; that no energy gets created in the universe, and that none dies. You want your mother to know that all your energy, every vibration, every Btu of heat, every wave of every particle that was her beloved child remains with her in this world. You want the physicist to tell your weeping father that amid energies of the cosmos, you gave as good as you got. And at one point you’d hope the physicist would step down from the pulpit and walk to your brokenhearted spouse there in the pew and tell him that all the photons that ever bounced off your face, all the particles whose paths were interrupted by your smile, by the touch of your hair, hundreds of trillions of particles, have raced off like children, their ways forever changed by you. And as your widow rocks in the arms of a loving family, may the physicist let her know that all the photons that bounced from you were gathered in the particle detectors that are her eyes, that those photons created within her constellations of electromagnetically charged neutrons whose energy will go on forever. You can hope your family will examine the evidence and satisfy themselves that the science is sound and that they’ll be comforted to know your energy’s still around. According to the law of the conservation of energy, not a bit of you is gone; you’re just less orderly.
  18. Quote from White Oleander by Janet Fitch

    If I were a poet, that’s what I’d write about. People who worked in the middle of the night. Men who loaded trains, emergency room nurses with their gentle hands. Night clerks in hotels, cabdrivers on graveyard, waitresses in all-night coffee shops. They knew the world, how precious it was when a person remembered your name, the comfort of a rhetorical question, “How’s it going, how’s the kids?” They knew how long the night was. They knew the sound life made as it left. It rattled, like a slamming screen door in the wind. Night workers lived without illusions, they wiped dreams off counters, they loaded freight. They headed back to the airport for one last fare.
  19. venting off

    I dont know where to begin , i just feel like every day is the same day and it really bothers me alot, like im wasting my life away, its not that i dont have a job because i know if i had one it would be the same , but then i would go to work and come home , sit down on here or watch tv? =( if i knew like would be like this at this age im in, why bother livingit? I do know though I have an amazing guy that loves me, and thats what keeping me here. but still i got these strong feelings goin through my head. “end this” ” do that” Just have a strong feeling of “doing that” on myself. I try not to think about it. damn….. I cant even sleep well. Is it fair to him that im likethis? I cant overcome how freakin lonely i feel, and yet i cant let anyone in my life because i got no energy to be social. I dont know anymore…. i know i want a package of cigarettes to relazwith.
  20. hurt so much

    Hey was awhile i wrote on here i think? Dont have any memory when it was. Im started to think what i thought before was true. theres no h ope for me, theres no joy or happiness waiting in the right corner. I cant even laugh anymore. I havent laughed for a looong time. only fake laughs when you laugh to make someone you are with not to think, why is she likethat?? I just mostly think horrible thoughts and cry before i go to sleep, or i cry whenever. Now i even try to push away people so they wont come to close to me, my feelings. I want no attachement. i dont want to hurt them more than i will when i dont want them nearme. current thought is Why was I born?=(
  21. Quote from Baby Picture by Anne Sexton

    Anne, who are you? Merely a kid keeping alive.
  22. Quote from You Are Not Christ by Rickey Laurentiis

    For the drowning, yes, there is always panic. Or peace. Your body behaving finally by instinct alone. Crossing out wonder. Crossing out a need to know. You only feel you need to live.
  23. Let everything happen to you. Beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final.
  24. Quote from Traveling by Stephen Dunn

    Then recite the list of what you’ve learned to do without. It is stronger than prayer.

About Us

Welcome to self-injury.net. We are a support community for self-harmers and also provide information on self-harm, creative works, media lists, lists of resources (helplines, textlines, mental health apps, therapists, etc.), etc. We focus on self-injury but a number of other mental health issues are included.


  • self-injury.net
  • Founded
  • Description
  • self-injury.net is a self-harm community and resource founded in 1999. Provides support, resources, and information on self-harm.
  • Founder
    Draco Malfoy Draco Malfoy