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    CallMeWinter

    Do I Ever Want To Stop...?


    • With as many times as I have asked myself this question, you’d think I’d have a sure answer by now. I don’t. I’m not sure if I want to stop self harming. What am I supposed to do when I stop? How will I get those feelings back, the feelings of release, without harming? What else is there? But on the other hand, I know that I am destroying my arm, hips, stomach, and legs. I know that it is not good for me. I know that I will have these embarrassing scars forever, and I know that I will always be making up excuses for cuts, scars, and burns. I don’t like the questions, but I love the pain. I don’t like the scars, but I love the cuts. What to do when you find yourself ripped in half by your own devices?

    • Person [female, age 16, began to SI at age 8, high school student]
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    masksofsmiles

    Posted · Report

    I have, repeatedly. Mostly to stop driving ‘friends’ away….
    But everytime I try…. I just get sucked back in. I never can find someone to help me… Or even say they give a crap. Joy.

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    I cut myself for the first time back in September (2010) and since then I have thought about doing it over and over. I have done it a total of four times, and three of the times were this month. (the 1st, the 13th, and the 20th of Jan ‘11) I have been trying to keep my mind off of it but every once in a while it gets this bad. I have been wanting to reach out to a teacher of mine, but I am scared to. I’m eighteen and a senior in high school…but I don’t know if I want to tell her because I’m scared she might tell my parents, which I don’t want. I am trying so hard to stop, because I don’t want to have scars everywhere. I don’t do it on my wrists for that reason. But I guess maybe in the future I might be able to help a daughter or son and let them know that I’ve gone through the same thing :) 

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Welcome to self-injury.net. We are a support community for self-harmers and also provide information on self-harm, creative works, media lists, lists of resources (helplines, textlines, mental health apps, therapists, etc.), etc. We focus on self-injury but a number of other mental health issues are included.

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  • self-injury.net
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  • self-injury.net is a self-harm community and resource founded in 1999. Provides support, resources, and information on self-harm.
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    Draco Malfoy Draco Malfoy
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