Stopping Self Injury..
I want more than anything to stop self injuring and just to be a healthy, happy person. Everyone always tells me I am so cheerful and smiling all the time, but they don’t know how I truly feel on the inside. I put on a show at school, at home, and in front of others. In reality, I am so hurt and broken. I use smiles to cover up the pain I feel. I feel like I am alone and no one understands me around here. When I think about my self injury, I feel like a freak….I don’t want to hurt myself anymore. I have been doing it for so long though, so now I rely on it and it is my security. I find it hard to completely stop self injuring. There have been periods in my life where I have not hurt myself, but it never lasts. I feel worthless and like I am dumb for not being able to stop my urges. I hate feeling this way. I hope one day I can be completely free of this illness.
Person [female, age 17, began to SI at age 11, high school student]