I Hate When They Figure Out...
For me, one of the worst parts of SI is when people you know figure out.
Sometimes, though ill feel comfortable if they know what im going through or if they do the same. But usually its jugdmental people in public, or worse your parents. When my mom figured out i hated it for so many reasons, one of course that i would have to deal with her speech and if u really knew me youd know she couldnt care less about me., and im not just saying that. But the worse part was her rage. no one could handle the situation worse. Im no expert buy i think breaking chairs and getting aggressive isnt a great way to help someone. of course later it was all about her and after each time she cought me she got worse and worse.
I really wish it was just between me and myself like it should be .. I should deal with it myself, and i couldnt even have the pleasure of hurting myself. of course it wasnt out of joy but its a personal decision and has nothing to do with anyone else. but now i cant because of all the arm checks. i hav cut my legs, but to me my arms are better.
My goal isnt to go around and tell everybody, and it is definently NOT for any sort of attention. Its completely personal and the last thing i want is for people to figure out. all i wish is that it was my choice wether i do or not and no one should try to prevent me.
Person [female, age 15, began to SI at age 13, high school student]