[female, age 18, began to think of SI at age 6 and can't remember when she began to SI, high school student]
By Draco Malfoy,
All three are pleasant, but in different way.\n\nBefore: I am haunted by the visions of the future and past actions. Usually, when I feel like self-injure mood again, I wait till I really do it, and the waiting period usually lasts 2 days. During those 2 days I’m possessed by all kinds of dark fantasies, beginning with self-injure, torture visions and ending with dreaming of ending my life as grim as possible, committing the most painful suicide ever and experiencing the longest death agony ever.\n\nDuring: trying to concentrate on suffering 100% while cutting deep and watching blood flow. Collecting all my willpower to bear more pain. Tasting my own blood. Ecstasy, euphoria, rising of the secret powers, secret energy from within myself.\n\nAfter: relaxation, watching the scars, repeating all the details of the action in my mind all over again, dreaming of doing it again, dreaming of killing myself.
Person [female, age 18, began to think of SI at age 6 and can't remember when she began to SI, high school student]