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    Draco Malfoy

    [female, age 19, began to SI at age 17]


    • Cutting came from curiosity. i spent a great deal of my late high school and early college years trying to be as others saw me (probably hoping to please them and, in turn, be loved). but finally, i gave in, accepted having emotions and stopped trying to be “acceptable”. through this turning point i became ridiculously curious about everything. i became anorexic, still am. i tried throwing up about five times. one day i tried self-cutting. it lasted for a brief period, it actually happened as a result of my eating disorder. i added cutting to my list of things to do when hungry (hoping it would be a sort of wake-up call and snap me back into reality so that i could continue my “crusade towards emaciation.” i remembered reading about self-cutting, and finally tried it with a piece of a broken place. i remember it didn’t hurt so much. the blood made me feel some sort of accomplishment. when it started going deep enough to cause blood, i definitely felt some sort of “ah yes, keep going”-feeling. it was like power. mind over matter. the cuts were like another little secret between me and myself. i think it made me feel closer to me. but the best part of the whole thing was watching the scars heal. i think that served as some sort of assurance that i’m “healing” in some way. looking at them throughout the day also helped me remember that i do feel. it was also definitely some sort of scream for acknowledgment, to be tended to, though i never showed them to anyone. in a way, the cuts helped me love myself, they were visual proof that i am a mess. for as long as i can remember i always wanted to be alone and a mess. be careful what you wish for…

    • Person [female, age 19, began to SI at age 17]
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About Us

Welcome to self-injury.net. We are a support community for self-harmers and also provide information on self-harm, creative works, media lists, lists of resources (helplines, textlines, mental health apps, therapists, etc.), etc. We focus on self-injury but a number of other mental health issues are included.

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  • self-injury.net is a self-harm community and resource founded in 1999. Provides support, resources, and information on self-harm.
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    Draco Malfoy Draco Malfoy
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