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    There Is TOTALLY Hope For EVERYONE!


    • To Begin, I Would Like To Let Everyone Know That When I Started Self Injury, I Was Young And I Honestly Didn’t Know What I Was Getting Into Until It Was Too Late And I Became Addicted. Here I Am, Now 21, Still Hurting Myself Over Things I Have Overcome With The Help Of Intensive Therapy And EMDR. A Lot Of People Don’t Know My Story, But If You’re Willing To Read, I’m Willing To Help In ANY Way Possible.

      I’ve Studied Classical Ballet Since I Was 4 And I Was SOOO Dedicated! I Literally Only Thought About Ballet. Remember When You Do Those Little Essays Throughout School About What You Want To Be When You Grow Up? I Have All Of Mine, And They Are Literally All About Being A Dancer! I Started Pointe When I Turned 11. Pointe Shoes Are Literally BOXES On Your Toes, Tight Boxes Attached To The Shank (Sole) Of The Shoe Which Was Very Flexible To Strengthen The Metatarsals And The Muscles All Around The Foot, Ankle, And Calves. I Would Dance Through Blisters And Even Through Nails Loosening In My Shoe And Piercing The Bottom Of My Feet. I Would Like The Pain, Because I Knew That Dancers Are Athletes Of The Gods! I Don’t Care If It Hurts, I Just Wanted To Dance. So Forth Brought My Eating Disorders While Hitting Puberty. When I Was 15 I Was Diagnosed With Bulimia And Actually Got Down To The Unhealthy Weight Of 95 Pounds. I Was 5’4”. 

      When I Was 14, I Had My First Boyfriend. We Dated For 2 Years, And Upon The Second Year Of Our Relationship, He Started Drug Usage (Mostly Marijuana) And Alcohol Abuse. He Would Regularly Come To Visit Me With Alcohol On His Breath And Joints Ready To Smoke. He Was A Wrestler At His High School, And A Very Strong One. He Would Like To Grab My Hair And Hit My Head Against Walls As A Joke. He Never Took “No” For An Answer, Even When It Would Come To Our Sexual Relationship. I Have To Say I Did Lose My Virginity To Him Willingly, But At Other Times, I Was Not Willing And It Happened Anyways. I Would Have To Hide Bruises And Injuries From Everyone Because He Would Get Very Violent With Me. I Know That He Had Problems Of His Own Due To His Parent’s Divorce, And I Would Always Convince Myself That I Could Help Him; I Thought I Was His Best Friend. Let’s Say He Had A Few More “Close Friends.” He Would Always Compare Me To All Of These Other “Close Friends” Saying, “For A Dancer, You Sure Do Remind Me Of A Hippo Sometimes,” And, “I Love When My Friends Get Belly Button Piercings! I Bet YOU Wish YOU Had One, But You Got That ‘Guurrrll Pudge’!” Yes, He Would Call It Girl Pudge. He Would Grab My Skin And Scratch At My Stomach And Hips While He Was High And Leave Gross, Bloody Patches Of Skin That People Thought Was Eczema. I Finally Ended Our Relationship At Our 2 Year Anniversary Where His Older Sisters Cussed Me Out And Called Me, “Scum Of The Earth.”

      I Didn’t Come Out To Anyone About The Abuse Until I Was 18. At 15 I Was Diagnosed With Manic Depression, Bi-Polarism, PTSD, And Bulimia. 

      Even Though I Have About 10 Failed Suicide Attempts, 7 Trips To The Behavioral Health Center, 4 Stays In A Mental Ward, 7 Demeaning Jobs To Pay For Medical Bills, 5 Years Of Bullying, And 7 Years Of Self Injury, I Have 1 Loving Mother And 1 Amazing Sister Who Will Always Pick Me Up. I’m Not Religious, But Whatever You Believe In, Whether It’s A Higher Power Or Just Pure Science, Someone Or Something Wanted YOU On This Earth At This Time And This Moment. You Might Not Know Now, But Good Things Come To Those Who Wait; Do What You Love And You WILL Find Your Purpose. I Promise!

       

    • Person Female, Age 21, Began To SI At Age 14, Barista
    •   Report For Self-Harmers Content
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About Us

Welcome to self-injury.net. We are a support community for self-harmers and also provide information on self-harm, creative works, media lists, lists of resources (helplines, textlines, mental health apps, therapists, etc.), etc. We focus on self-injury but a number of other mental health issues are included.

General

  • self-injury.net
  • Founded
  • Description
  • self-injury.net is a self-harm community and resource founded in 1999. Provides support, resources, and information on self-harm.
  • Founder
    Draco Malfoy Draco Malfoy
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