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    have a heartZBJ

    what i know


    • I’ve been cutting myself since I was 11, but have vivid memories of when I was even years younger, slamming my head on the walls as hard as I could, or purposely falling off of dangerous bridges I would build in my room with the intention of self-harm. I suppose that because I’ve been doing it for so long, it’s something I just know. When I feel embarrassed, I feel the need to hurt myself. When others treat me badly, I find myself wanting to do it. It’s a way to punish myself, and get what I feel I deserve for being who I am. I’ve always hated myself, and have never been happy with who I am. I’ve taken so much crap from my family about how I think and act, and I have no real close friends I can talk to this sort of thing about. Cutting does not make me feel better about myself, only worse, but it’s the one thing I know to do when I mess up. It helps me remember never to do it again. It’s also a release. So much negative energy, emotion, and frustration builds up inside of me, and I don’t know what to do with it other than let it out. It’s my release, punishment, and reminder. It doesn’t help me like myself any more, and it sure as heck doesn’t help other people treat me better, either.

    • Person [female, 19, began to SI at age ~5, university student]
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    Hey there. Your story stood out to me as it’s so similar to mine and I just feel for you. The difference is I do have friends I can talk to. I don’t think anyone should have to go alone, so I want to offer you my friendship.

    Haha I sound so formal. Comment back if you want to get in touch x

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    Hello, your story really touched me, and I see your problems, though I cant understand you because Ive never been in such a hard position as you are. Anyway, Im doing an essay about SI and I was wondering if I could quote you on the introduction of this essay, in this part:

    “Cutting does not make me feel better about myself, only worse, but it’s the one thing I know to do when I mess up.”

    Of course, its all your decision.

    I also wanted to tell you that you´re not alone, as one friend of mine says: you need darkness to see the light and Im with you.

     

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Welcome to self-injury.net. We are a support community for self-harmers and also provide information on self-harm, creative works, media lists, lists of resources (helplines, textlines, mental health apps, therapists, etc.), etc. We focus on self-injury but a number of other mental health issues are included.

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  • self-injury.net
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  • self-injury.net is a self-harm community and resource founded in 1999. Provides support, resources, and information on self-harm.
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    Draco Malfoy Draco Malfoy
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